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View Full Version : OC humorists rejoice! - Sarah in at Kelly



4wheeldrifter
02-19-04, 08:45 AM
http://sports.excite.com/news/02182004/v4200.html

Yet another season of material. Wonder what Al Jr's plans are?

chop456
02-19-04, 08:54 AM
"Golly, can I have your autograph too, Mr. Lazier?"
http://ak.imgfarm.com/images/ap/IRL_FISHER.sff_NY158_20040218140038.jpg

Racewriter
02-19-04, 09:54 AM
TonyBucks to the rescue...

KLang
02-19-04, 10:26 AM
Fisher won't race in the opener Feb. 29 at Homestead, Fla., and isn't sure how many races she will do.

Not too many TonyBucks.

Racing Truth
02-19-04, 01:34 PM
http://sports.excite.com/news/02182004/v4200.html

Yet another season of material. Wonder what Al Jr's plans are?

Further proof that you CAN indeed add a driver to the field, and suffer a net LOSS in overall talent. :shakehead :gomer:

Al Jr. is still, from what I've read, working on a deal with Patrick. We'll see.

Ankf00
02-19-04, 04:00 PM
Al Jr. is still, from what I've read, working on a deal with Patrick. We'll see.

this year's field could use some kwality comic relief :gomer:

pchall
02-19-04, 04:37 PM
That loud sigh from the east you heard was David Couhltard's relief in knowing that his seat at McLaren is safte for yet another season.

oddlycalm
02-19-04, 06:03 PM
Good 'ol Sarah, pretty as a pork shoulder roast and sharp as a butter knife. I can almost see her racing backwards through the pack if I just squint my eyes...

oc

WestMcLarenF1
02-19-04, 06:45 PM
Up until now her excuse was always poor equipment, the car not being set up properly, or just "I'm so sorry". Now, what's the excuse going to be? Anyone? :shakehead

Turn7
02-19-04, 06:53 PM
Up until now her excuse was always poor equipment, the car not being set up properly, or just "I'm so sorry". Now, what's the excuse going to be? Anyone? :shakehead

2:1 odds it is something like, "AUJ left the ashtray full and a cigarette butt flew up and hit me in the eye."

JohnHKart
02-19-04, 07:48 PM
I think it's time to start a Sad Sara Watch. Oh the futility of it all!

John

Racing Truth
02-19-04, 08:55 PM
Good 'ol Sarah, pretty as a pork shoulder roast and sharp as a butter knife. I can almost see her racing backwards through the pack if I just squint my eyes...

oc

:laugh: :laugh: Nah, that'd be giving her too much credit.

Railbird
02-19-04, 09:20 PM
Racefans, you may be looking at this situation from the wrong end.

We are talking Team Kelley here, the underachiever of the IRL. Even though Tom is proud of being a Penske synchophant, he has yet to elevate his team beyond the early IRL performance level.

While they've never actually attempted to refuel a burning car that I know of, they have been known to commit such gaffs at Indy as leaving the warm-up plugs in the radiator......

and employing Scott Sharp

The future F1 diva may well be an upgrade.

"I'm sorry"

fourrunner
02-19-04, 09:32 PM
It's amazing... As each year passes... Sarah is looking more and more like Forner Secretery of State Madelyn Albright .... Oooh La La!!! ;)

Jag_Warrior
02-19-04, 09:44 PM
"At any race, the longest line for autographs is for her," Nation said. Yeaaaah. That's what I'm talkin' about! :thumbup:

Robstar
02-19-04, 09:47 PM
It's amazing... As each year passes... Sarah is looking more and more like Forner Secretery of State Madelyn Albright .... Oooh La La!!! ;)

:rofl:

fourrunner
02-19-04, 09:57 PM
"At any race, the longest line for autographs is for her," Nation said. Yeaaaah. That's what I'm talkin' about! :thumbup:


And there they stand in line... The "DNF's" of Life... to pay homage to their Poster Girl !! :eek:

Ankf00
02-19-04, 10:41 PM
It's amazing... As each year passes... Sarah is looking more and more like Forner Secretery of State Madelyn Albright .... Oooh La La!!! ;)
you are a sick sick...

BLOODY SICK man.

chop456
02-20-04, 12:06 AM
"At any race, the longest line for autographs is for her," Nation said. Yeaaaah. That's what I'm talkin' about! :thumbup:

Much like on the track, where she also has the longest line of cars in front of her.

Wabbit
02-20-04, 12:52 AM
You guys are mean. :shakehead

Brickman
02-20-04, 01:05 AM
Racefans, you may be looking at this situation from the wrong end.

We are talking Team Kelley here, the underachiever of the IRL. Even though Tom is proud of being a Penske synchophant, he has yet to elevate his team beyond the early IRL performance level.

While they've never actually attempted to refuel a burning car that I know of, they have been known to commit such gaffs at Indy as leaving the warm-up plugs in the radiator......

and employing Scott Sharp

The future F1 diva may well be an upgrade.

"I'm sorry"

Sad but true.

cart7
02-20-04, 07:19 AM
2:1 odds it is something like, "AUJ left the ashtray full and a cigarette butt flew up and hit me in the eye."
Don't forget all the empty's all over the floor. Damn cans keep rolling under the brake and accelerator peddles.

Just think what a year of tutelage under Scott Not-So Sharp will do for her. Now she'll be blocking professionally. :gomer:

JohnHKart
02-20-04, 07:30 AM
Don't forget all the empty's all over the floor. Damn cans keep rolling under the brake and accelerator peddles.

Just think what a year of tutelage under Scott Not-So Sharp will do for her. Now she'll be blocking professionally. :gomer:


And that is "sheer lunacy!"

John

Insomniac
02-20-04, 09:59 AM
Up until now her excuse was always poor equipment, the car not being set up properly, or just "I'm so sorry". Now, what's the excuse going to be? Anyone? :shakehead

All she needs is a ride with Penske, AG or TCGR and she'll prove she's a champion!

Racing Truth
02-20-04, 01:09 PM
You guys are mean. :shakehead

Perhaps...oh h=ll, no we're not. Trust me, she's an embarassment to her profession.

But 'Bird might have a point.

Racing Truth
02-20-04, 01:11 PM
Don't forget all the empty's all over the floor. Damn cans keep rolling under the brake and accelerator peddles.

Just think what a year of tutelage under Scott Not-So Sharp will do for her. Now she'll be blocking professionally. :gomer:

Yeah, that's about the only thing Sharp can do consistently.

fourrunner
02-20-04, 03:36 PM
All she needs is a ride with Penske, AG or TCGR and she'll prove she's a champion!


Then Why didn't they give her a ride... Hell Andretti /Green is adding cars to PAD the field like Rabbits have babies.

Certainly Penske & Ganassi could help her prove she's a Champion.. I mean it WOULD help the series, wouldn't it.

I'm sure Tony George has asked them! Wonder what they said back? :eek:

And no less an EXPERT on Drivers than the Boss of Tag Heuer has said she's Formula 1 Material... Wouldn't Ganassi want to have one more driver move WAAAYYYY Up to that series.

Of Course we know that Tag Heuer uses her to pose with their Watches because you would RATHER Look at the Watch ! Thats sheer genius! ;)

Insomniac
02-20-04, 04:22 PM
Then Why didn't they give her a ride... Hell Andretti /Green is adding cars to PAD the field like Rabbits have babies.

Certainly Penske & Ganassi could help her prove she's a Champion.. I mean it WOULD help the series, wouldn't it.

I'm sure Tony George has asked them! Wonder what they said back? :eek:

I think they're sexist. They don't want a woman to succeed. She just needs a chance to prove she can keep the pedal down just as good as the next guy.

fourrunner
02-20-04, 04:36 PM
You may have a point on the Sexist part..... Penske, Ganassi, and Mike Andretti definitely prefer Men! ;)

But I'm not sure the IRL is where you can show your abilities as a Race Driver anyway ! Peddle to the Metal and all that! ;)

Winston Wolfe
02-20-04, 09:11 PM
Of Course we know that Tag Heuer uses her to pose with their Watches because you would RATHER Look at the Watch ! Thats sheer genius! ;)

LMAO!!!! :)
Genius. Sheer GENIUS, I tell ya!!!! :rofl:

Insomniac
02-20-04, 09:16 PM
You may have a point on the Sexist part..... Penske, Ganassi, and Mike Andretti definitely prefer Men! ;)

But I'm not sure the IRL is where you can show your abilities as a Race Driver anyway ! Peddle to the Metal and all that! ;)

But you also have to turn the wheel just enough to the left to avoid the wall. That takes skills!

TRDfan
02-20-04, 10:39 PM
Good god she'll be in a Toyota.

This may prevent me from hanging this years drivers poster in my office.

Rob
02-20-04, 10:55 PM
Good god she'll be in a Toyota. This may prevent me from hanging this years drivers poster in my office.
So that's one wall she won't hit this season.

4wheeldrifter
02-21-04, 01:13 PM
You may have a point on the Sexist part..... Penske, Ganassi, and Mike Andretti definitely prefer Men! ;)

But I'm not sure the IRL is where you can show your abilities as a Race Driver anyway ! Peddle to the Metal and all that! ;)

Hey, you try holding YOUR foot to the floor for 2-3 hours straight. The training they must have to go through to keep from getting a foot cramp or having your toes fall asleep must be intense. That takes ability, man, real ability. ;) :p

pchall
02-21-04, 04:29 PM
Hey, you try holding YOUR foot to the floor for 2-3 hours straight. The training they must have to go through to keep from getting a foot cramp or having your toes fall asleep must be intense. That takes ability, man, real ability. ;) :p

Are you volunteering to be the Divine Sarah's personal foot masseuse, or what? :p

skaven
02-23-04, 11:55 AM
So that's one wall she won't hit this season.

:rofl: Man, I kept it together through this whole thread, but that finally pummeled me into laughing out loud. Also, I'll never look at a pork roast shoulder the same way.

4wheeldrifter
02-23-04, 02:17 PM
Are you volunteering to be the Divine Sarah's personal foot masseuse, or what? :p

There's a mental image I could have really done without... :eek: :laugh:

Turn7
02-23-04, 02:26 PM
Are you volunteering to be the Divine Sarah's personal foot masseuse, or what? :p


You can't massage a hoof.

Steve99
02-23-04, 03:20 PM
Hey, you try holding YOUR foot to the floor for 2-3 hours straight. The training they must have to go through to keep from getting a foot cramp or having your toes fall asleep must be intense. That takes ability, man, real ability. ;) :p

That's what all the yellows are for, so they can rest their foot.

Jag_Warrior
03-06-04, 01:13 PM
You can't massage a hoof.


Ouch!!! That's gonna leave a bruise. :rofl:

I was counting ceiling tiles on "race day". How did Kermit the Frog's rotund gal-pal do?

And BTW, no one has posted the TV ratings for the barn burner. You guys are getting slow on the trigger.

Insomniac
03-06-04, 07:23 PM
Ouch!!! That's gonna leave a bruise. :rofl:

I was counting ceiling tiles on "race day". How did Kermit the Frog's rotund gal-pal do?

And BTW, no one has posted the TV ratings for the barn burner. You guys are getting slow on the trigger.

She didn't have a ride at Homestead. In the booth talking about her boyfriend. I think the rating was a 0.9 in another thread.

EDwardo
03-06-04, 08:04 PM
All of you are missing the obvious here. AJ4 needs a drafting partner.......

Jag_Warrior
03-06-04, 11:47 PM
In the booth talking about her boyfriend.

Cute couple. http://my.athenet.net/~denij/smcutecouple.JPG

I'm sorry. Couldn't resist... :o

Thanks for the ratings. .9 final? Pretty standard, eh?

Winston Wolfe
03-07-04, 12:11 AM
Cute couple. http://my.athenet.net/~denij/smcutecouple.JPG

I'm sorry. Couldn't resist... :o

Thanks for the ratings. .9 final? Pretty standard, eh?

Sarah quoteth: "....oh, Sorry, guys...."
She is the Rosie O'Donnel of round-y-round drivers.
Always opening her pie-hole, before her brain has been placed in gear!

Nice work on the watches, folks.... "they'll all be looking at the watch".... BRILLIANT! - bravo - TAG-Heuer !