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XFT
12-10-03, 07:09 PM
THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS
by Lucy Mae Globule
The Steering Wheel newsletter
Atlanta Region
SCCA - December 1966

'Twas the night before Christmas, and out on the street,
Sat my poor little Healey, all covered with sleet.
The starter was frozen, the battery dead,
And clusters of icicles hung from the head.
Carol with the cables, and I with the crank,
Were trying to start it, but drawing a blank.
The best we could raise was a weak little clatter,
When what did our wandering eyeballs perceive,
But a fat little man you just wouldn't believe.
His cap was made up from a bundle of wire,
The tails of his coat were a crackling fire;
His eyes were like lightbulbs (and one didn't work);
The man was a real electrical jerk!

He opened the bonnet and started to poke,
Thus causing a short and a puff of blue smoke.
He crackled and sizzled, then giving a zap,
He fractured the damn distributor cap.
He walked to the back end and giving a thump,
He jammed up the points on my Lucas fuel pump.
And laying a finger aside of his nose,
He sizzled away while the two of us froze.
He sprang to his car, in a movement so smart,
We almost expected the damn thing to start.
The starter turned over, the engine roared out,
And over the clatter we heard Lucas shout;
"Out MG, Out SPRIDGET, Out HEALEY, and SPRITE,
Out LUCAS IGNITION this cold winter's night!"
And we heard him exclaim as skyward he roared,
"So long, crazy YANKEES! I'm powered by Ford!"