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View Full Version : The Foyt Futility Watch -- The San Paolo Edition



pchall
03-12-10, 08:25 AM
Our favorite All American Dirt Track and Oval Series opens its season on the streets of a city in a foreign country. Meanwhile, the IRL web site promos the event with a clip from CART 1996 on the roval. How the world turns upside down.

If I can find an entry list that doesn't need half an hour of editing before pasting it here I will add it later. Right now I'm off to Home Depot so I can get back to a plumbing job that is really ruining my Spring Break.

Don Quixote
03-12-10, 09:09 AM
Your plumbing exercise will draw higher ratings than the "race" in Brazil. :D

TravelGal
03-12-10, 01:06 PM
Does that plumbing job have anything to do with toilets and flushing sounds? If so, it would be very appropriate.

pchall
03-12-10, 04:58 PM
Does that plumbing job have anything to do with toilets and flushing sounds? If so, it would be very appropriate.

A new wax ring under the bowl will keep the crapwagon smells where they belong. Using a die tool to even up the valve seat surfaces inside the old Moen faucet will stop the menace of the Midnight Drip. The water here will eat the metal fillings out of your teeth, which is a great reason for keeping beer in the fridge and wine and spirits elsewhere. Better dental health through alcohol consumption. Does Barack know about this? :) The plumbing for the new pedestal sink was straight forward and just time consuming. The hook ups I put in about twenty years ago needed some massaging.

An IRL must read [not] headline:

HVM, Andretti expand downwards

As if there is any upwards in the IRL. :shakehead

Here's the link to the straight poop on this deal (http://www.crash.net/indycar/news/157614/1/hvm_andretti_expand_downwards.html).

Methanolandbrats
03-12-10, 05:35 PM
Is it this weekend? :confused: I did'nt even know, guess I'm not on the edge of my seat.

grungex
03-12-10, 05:38 PM
Can someone point me to the correct channel number for Versus on DirecTV? I can't seem to find it...








:p

pchall
03-12-10, 05:45 PM
Watch/listen March 13 to practice (7 and 10:30 a.m. ET sessions) and qualifications (1:30 p.m. ET) from the 2.6-mile, 11-turn Sao Paulo circuit.

For those of you who WDGAF or are otherwise engaged at the time, I'll cobble together some kind of Futility Report as usual. This is, after all, more fun than home plumbing. But you know what? I can fix the plumbing but the IRL is hopelessly trapped crap.

Duroc
03-12-10, 07:41 PM
I wonder if the return freight is paid.

emjaya
03-12-10, 10:24 PM
For those of you who WDGAF or are otherwise engaged at the time, I'll cobble together some kind of Futility Report as usual. This is, after all, more fun than home plumbing. But you know what? I can fix the plumbing but the IRL is hopelessly trapped crap.

I'd rather hear more about the plumbing: wax ring under the bowl?

Kiwifan
03-12-10, 10:56 PM
I'd rather hear more about the plumbing: wax ring under the bowl?

They have funny toilets up there em, water goes round the other way and it comes outta a wee hole at quite a blast, scared the **** out of me the first time. :) And what's up with keeping the bowl more than half full? I can imagine a few folk getting quite a shock on a Sunday morning talking to the Great White Telephone. ;)

pchall
03-13-10, 12:22 AM
I'd rather hear more about the plumbing: wax ring under the bowl?

The wax ring seals the whole piping for the commode. Keeps the waste water and the gases where they belong -- under the fill water in the bowl . The proper analogy might be the Foyt Futility Watch -- which I think helps keep most of the IRL crap and sewage gas out of Offcamber.net. :)

dando
03-13-10, 04:05 PM
Quals moved to race day. :laugh: :saywhat: :shakehead

http://www.indycar.com/news/show/55-izod-indycar-series/34756-qualifications-moved-to-race-day/

-Kevin

oddlycalm
03-13-10, 05:32 PM
The proper analogy might be the Foyt Futility Watch -- which I think helps keep most of the IRL crap and sewage gas out of Offcamber.net. :)
That is indeed a great analogy. :thumbup:

oc

TravelGal
03-13-10, 05:47 PM
Quals moved to race day. :laugh: :saywhat: :shakehead

http://www.indycar.com/news/show/55-izod-indycar-series/34756-qualifications-moved-to-race-day/

-Kevin

OKAAAAAAY. I looked. Checked the revised schedule to see if there would be what CCWS considered the requisite interval between the morning warm up (now quals) and the race. Guess what? No race listed. An oversight? :laugh:

High Sided
03-13-10, 06:13 PM
race time didn't change, nothing to revise. 3hr between qualify end and race start.

Chief
03-13-10, 06:56 PM
Oh the futility of it all....driver boycott looming, what with all the telephone poles exposed and painted concrete, not to mention the fresh asphalt that yields 4 wheel air at 190mph.

When the IRL steps in it....BOY do they step in it.:laugh:

G.
03-13-10, 08:02 PM
Thank GOD they had the foresight to not have any support series races! That would really hamper their schedule changes.


:laugh:

Winston Wolfe
03-14-10, 12:53 AM
the main straight is painted concrete from Carnival'.... :thumbup:
Promoters didnt figger that formula cars with practically thousands of HP would slide.... the best part is that its ON THE FRIGGIN MAIN STRAIGHT under the flag stand at S/F !!!!!
Truly a great way to start off the final season of EARL :tony:

grungex
03-14-10, 01:21 AM
Hey, they're professional race car drivers, they ought to be able to compensate for poor traction conditions. Stupid IRL weenies...

IlliniRacer
03-14-10, 07:18 AM
New definition of irony

http://www.indycar.com/news/show/55-izod-indycar-series/34756-qualifications-moved-to-race-day/

pchall
03-14-10, 11:21 AM
FWIW, Simona de Silverstro out qualified Danica Patrick. Milka Duno is DFL.

dando
03-14-10, 12:11 PM
So Micro get a facial like Herta. :gomer: :saywhat:

-Kevin

dando
03-14-10, 01:12 PM
Instant idiots...just add water. :gomer:

-Kevin

cameraman
03-14-10, 02:19 PM
Well I just took a look, they are up and running on the narrowest track I've ever seen. It makes Vancouver look like Cleveland:shakehead

Anyhow I've got errands to run.

dando
03-14-10, 02:41 PM
Well I just took a look, they are up and running on the narrowest track I've ever seen. It makes Vancouver look like Cleveland:shakehead

Reminds me a Belle Isle. There's actually been passing @ the front. Go figger.

They also had the Delta Wang prototype in the studio and showed several other concepts from Swift, Lola, BAT, etc. during the rain delay. I still don't see how that sucker will turn. :saywhat: :confused:

-Kevin

Methanolandbrats
03-14-10, 03:20 PM
Just rolled the tape. Hmmmm.... The Brazilians are sophisticated motor racing consumers, so how did they pawn this crap off on them?

pchall
03-14-10, 03:50 PM
Ho hum.

1 * Will Power (12) Dallara/Honda 75 * - *
2 * Ryan Hunter-Reay (37) Dallara/Honda - * - *
3 * Vitor Meira (14) Dallara/Honda - * - *
4 * Raphael Matos (2) Dallara/Honda - * - *
5 * Dan Wheldon (4) Dallara/Honda - * - *
6 * Scott Dixon (9) Dallara/Honda - * - *
7 * Dario Franchitti (10) Dallara/Honda - * -
8 * Mike Conway (24) Dallara/Honda - * - *
9 * Helio Castroneves (3) Dallara/Honda - * - *
10 * Tony Kanaan (11) Dallara/Honda - * - *
11 * Justin Wilson (22) Dallara/Honda - * - *
12 * E.J. Viso (8) Dallara/Honda - * - *
13 * Ana Beatriz (23) Dallara/Honda - * - *
14 * Ryan Briscoe (6) Dallara/Honda - * -
15 * Danica Patrick (7) Dallara/Honda - * - *
16 (R)* Simona de Silvestro (78) Dallara/Honda - * - *
17 (R)* Mario Romancini (34) Dallara/Honda - * -
18 * Alex Tagliani (77) Dallara/Honda - * - *
19 (R)* Alex Lloyd (19) Dallara/Honda - * - *
20 * Hideki Mutoh (6) Dallara/Honda - * - *
21 * Milka Duno (18) Dallara/Honda - * - *
22 (R)* Takuma Sato (5) Dallara/Honda
23 * Marco Andretti (26) Dallara/Honda :rofl:
24 * Mario Moraes (32) Dallara/Honda

dando
03-14-10, 04:03 PM
23 * Marco Andretti (26) Dallara/Honda :rofl:


http://www.seattlepi.com/dayart/aponline/44163.51Brazil-IRL-Auto-Racing.sff.jpg

Micro got the position, tho. :gomer:

-Kevin

grungex
03-14-10, 05:26 PM
I don't know why, Moraes is clearly in front.

NismoZ
03-14-10, 06:34 PM
Here we go again....11 posts in the F-1 topic, 28 here. You guys pay way more attention to the IRL than the pinochle of motorsports!:D

Methanolandbrats
03-14-10, 08:01 PM
Here we go again....11 posts in the F-1 topic, 28 here. You guys pay way more attention to the IRL than the pinocle of motorsports!:D:D I taped it and made it through Bob Jenkins and a couple of Arute's interviews and that was as far as I got. Could'nt even last until the green flag and I don't care. I like reading about the race on this site :D

NismoZ
03-14-10, 09:37 PM
One thing I noticed is "Jackie" Arute sounds like he should be in a hospital. Seriously, the guy is having breathing problems. Heart? Lungs? Does he have asthma? I just CAN'T listen to him without thinking of Greg Ray. Why is that?;)

stroker
03-14-10, 10:49 PM
I just CAN'T listen to him without thinking of Greg Ray. Why is that?;)

Funny, I just can't listen to him, period.


Or Jenkins either, for that matter. Who was the other guy? He sucked, too.

G.
03-14-10, 10:53 PM
Jenkins apparently apologized for his work in a post over at TF. Just look for "What an Idiot!"

TKGAngel
03-15-10, 08:54 AM
One thing I noticed is "Jackie" Arute sounds like he should be in a hospital. Seriously, the guy is having breathing problems. Heart? Lungs? Does he have asthma?

I caught that during the race. He seemed incredibly out of breath. Was it fro
being the only one in Brazil and having to schlep up & down pit road all by himself?

Also, I did catch Jenkins referring to Brazil as Brassiere at one point. Wonder what he was thinking about?

And in my own defense, I only watched the race with one eye. The other is swollen shut from an infection.

Andrew Longman
03-15-10, 10:09 AM
Jenkins apparently apologized for his work in a post over at TF. Just look for "What an Idiot!"

Saw that this morning. Don't bother unless you crave a four [EDIT Seven] page internet lovefest fawning over all the great years and moments he has given the sport.:rolleyes:

Don Quixote
03-15-10, 10:53 AM
Saw that this morning. Don't bother unless you crave a four page internet lovefest fawning over all the great years and moments he has given the sport.:rolleyes: That's all they have now. Can't you imagine us doing the same thing for Paul Page? :gomer:

NismoZ
03-15-10, 12:31 PM
Ahhh, the good old days...those great pre 500 intros...I mean, they REALLY WERE good. Some people just hang around too long become entitled and get lazy. I've had it in for Page ever since he stuck his van in MY parking space at RA. :irked:

NismoZ
03-15-10, 12:39 PM
Stroker, what? You don't remember "the Tiger Woods of Auto racing!?" The Root even denied saying it, but he did...more than once. I doubt however ol' Greg has an entourage of long-haired Scandanavian beauties seeking his company...women, I mean.

stroker
03-15-10, 12:48 PM
Stroker, what? You don't remember "the Tiger Woods of Auto racing!?" The Root even denied saying it, but he did...more than once. I doubt however ol' Greg has an entourage of long-haired Scandanavian beauties seeking his company...women, I mean.

Seriously, I only watched a few minutes and turned it off. I heard the third guy's voice but never heard an introduction. No idea who he was, just didn't impress me in the short time I watched.

cameraman
03-15-10, 01:38 PM
I watched about 5 minutes and I was immediately struck by how much it looked like a CCWS race with really ugly cars. It looks to me that TG has successfully recreated the last year of Champ Car.:shakehead

NismoZ
03-15-10, 02:12 PM
I agree. More roads and streets than ovals. More women & Bazillions than mid-westerners. Big crowd. HUGE TV audience (in Brazil) Biggest EVER, I hear. "Spectacular and thrilling" according to Autosport. By almost any measure it'd have to be scored a great success (not knowing the botton line) and could become a mainstay. Wait 'til the DeltaWang gets here!:gomer:

TrueBrit
03-15-10, 04:26 PM
Oh WGAF...I was so bored for a sport to watch yesterday afternoon but I still didn't watch that crap..

High Sided
03-15-10, 05:05 PM
Can someone point me to the correct channel number for Versus on DirecTV? I can't seem to find it...:p


603, versus is back on direct tv just in time for you to watch tonights re-air of the race. :tony:

NismoZ
03-15-10, 06:37 PM
See, me Bro invited me over because he has a new big screen and gets Vs and he isn't nice to me very often :D so I had to go watch...for awhile. Left after the red and restart...was glad to hear Will Power won. Now, if he just didn't drive for the Cap'n. But then he probably wouldn't have won. Oh, well. Fun seeing Simona lead for awhile. She drove really well...for a girl.;)

opinionated ow
03-15-10, 07:07 PM
See, me Bro invited me over because he has a new big screen and gets Vs and he isn't nice to me very often :D so I had to go watch...for awhile. Left after the red and restart...was glad to hear Will Power won. Now, if he just didn't drive for the Cap'n. But then he probably wouldn't have won. Oh, well. Fun seeing Simona lead for awhile. She drove really well...for a girl.;)

Oh, Oh, Oh...are you looking for a fight mate? ;) :p


(Reprising the role of OC approved Simona defender)

pchall
03-15-10, 10:01 PM
Oh, Oh, Oh...are you looking for a fight mate? ;) :p


(Reprising the role of OC approved Simona defender)

Doesn't seem like it will take too many races before Simona starts humbling the Princess Permapout.:)

Methanolandbrats
03-15-10, 10:40 PM
Doesn't seem like it willtake too many races before Simona starts humbling the Princess Permapout.:)

The Go Daddy *** bucket really needs to go away, hopefully this will accelerate the process.

Sean Malone
03-16-10, 08:53 AM
Bhuel is the one that is like nails on a chalk board to me. Can't stand him.

That race was rather surreal to me with the strange over-saturated video, the strange dust bowl down the start/finish 'hallway', the bumps, the ridebuyers. Weird race.

Elmo T
03-16-10, 02:17 PM
That race was rather surreal to me with the strange over-saturated video, the strange dust bowl down the start/finish 'hallway', the bumps, the ridebuyers. Weird race.

No jet dryers there? And I thought there was something wrong with the DVR. :shakehead

I watched it DVR style to fast forward through the bad/boring stuff. Made for a quick review.

The broadcast team was painful.

Mrs. Elmo watched about 30 seconds and asked what the **** was wrong with the track that it was so bumpy.

I think the only positive was seeing Simona run well in her first race, albeit in an IRL sled.

dando
03-16-10, 02:21 PM
No jet dryers there? And I thought there was something wrong with the DVR. :shakehead

I watched it DVR style to fast forward through the bad/boring stuff. Made for a quick review.

The broadcast team was painful.

Mrs. Elmo watched about 30 seconds and asked what the **** was wrong with the track that it was so bumpy.

I think the only positive was seeing Simona run well in her first race, albeit in an IRL sled.

If you think this was fun, just wait for the Olympics in '16. :gomer: :saywhat:

-Kevin

TravelGal
03-16-10, 05:53 PM
If you think this was fun, just wait for the Olympics in '16. :gomer: :saywhat:

-Kevin

Word.

grungex
03-17-10, 01:52 AM
Doesn't seem like it will take too many races before Simona starts humbling the Princess Permapout.:)

Over at gomer central, Hoop-98-stone is falling all over himself with stats to prove Danica was faster in every way.

NismoZ
03-17-10, 10:39 AM
Match race!

Hard Driver
03-17-10, 11:00 AM
Look, now that Tony George is out, I can appease my hatred and give the race a chance. Just watched on the DVR last night, and I would say that the race was interesting. Not great and there were times when it did not look very professional, but it was interesting.

There were many on track passes for the lead, something I don't think happened in the F1 race. Lot's of nose to tail racing. The course with the incredibly narrow walls, dust, bumps, etc. looked a bit cobbled together, but at least it did not have a jump over RR tracks.

Seemed very CART like in many ways.

Personally, it seems to me like the IRL realizes that CART had the right idea with the road courses and that open wheel fans want something different than an open wheel NASCAR. So the IRL is trying to grasp back at what was working for Indycar before the split. Now that Tony is F'ed, as most of us have wished for (FTG), I can care a bit more about the IRL. Is it CART 1995, well no where close. But it is what we get for open wheel racing in the USA.

dando
03-17-10, 11:18 AM
There were many on track passes for the lead, something I don't think happened in the F1 race. Lot's of nose to tail racing. The course with the incredibly narrow walls, dust, bumps, etc. looked a bit cobbled together, but at least it did not have a jump over RR tracks.


It sucked less. :) I don't recall which turn it was, but there was one turn where RHR was passed several times either for the lead or a spot or two behind the lead. :saywhat: There was also one spot on the track where RHR caught some air (I didn't see it, but I heard Jenkins commenting about the sparks).

-Kevin

TKGAngel
03-17-10, 03:16 PM
If you think this was fun, just wait for the Olympics in '16. :gomer: :saywhat:

-Kevin

Heh. Beccy Gordon made a comment on Twitter that when they weren't at the track they were locked at the hotel because it wasn't safe to go anywhere alone.

And ratings were a 0.4 (http://www.usatoday.com/sports/motor/2010-03-17-933519490_x.htm).

dando
03-17-10, 03:40 PM
Heh. Beccy Gordon made a comment on Twitter that when they weren't at the track they were locked at the hotel because it wasn't safe to go anywhere alone.

And ratings were a 0.4 (http://www.usatoday.com/sports/motor/2010-03-17-933519490_x.htm).

I have no idea what the IOC was thinking when the selected Rio for the game. :shakehead :saywhat:

Looks like the rating could have been a .5 if you have two eyeballs watching the race. ;)

-Kevin

emjaya
03-17-10, 07:13 PM
I have no idea what the IOC was thinking when the selected Rio for the game. :shakehead :saywhat:


50 strippers and a pound of blow.

Indy
03-18-10, 12:56 AM
I have no idea what the IOC was thinking when the selected Rio for the game. :shakehead :saywhat:

They were thinking, "Oh, look, someone gave me a new condominium. How thoughtful."

Don Quixote
03-18-10, 09:40 AM
They were thinking, "Oh, look, someone gave me a new condominium. How thoughtful." "A condo with hot and cold running hookers, how thoughtful." :D

SurfaceUnits
03-18-10, 10:46 AM
A new wax ring under the bowl will keep the crapwagon smells where they belong.


so you are the source of the filling between the bread of the sammiches the :gomer:s have been feasting on for so many years.

Penicillin works on that midnight drip

Indy
03-18-10, 09:38 PM
"A condo with hot and cold running hookers, how thoughtful." :D

There is nothing like a nice, hot hooker shower after a long day of bureaucratic inefficiency and corrupt dealings.

High Sided
03-18-10, 10:42 PM
There is nothing like a nice, hot hooker shower after a long day of bureaucratic inefficiency and corrupt dealings.

:)

Don Quixote
03-19-10, 07:56 AM
There is nothing like a nice, hot hooker shower after a long day of bureaucratic inefficiency and corrupt dealings.After a long day of taking and laundering bribes, managing off shore bank accounts, calling in favors, embezzling funds, doctoring expense accounts, etc, a long hot shower with companionship is the ticket. :thumbup:

SurfaceUnits
03-20-10, 12:07 PM
I can care a bit more about the IRL.
you and the mindy place fans

EDIT:The mindy place fans are going nutzo with all the success TOney GEOrge has brought to their leeg